22 Feb 2021

Facing Life’s Devastating Challenges

How do you face problems challenges and struggles?

Today I wanted to share with you my method of dealing with challenges and struggles that I face. When you implement this method of dealing with a challenge, you stay in creative reparative and healing mode.

The method of facing your challenges and struggles is with laughter and happiness; always looking for the lesson and value from the challenge. I know it seems counter-intuitive to laugh about a problem, but the rewards for this are much more significant.

Some of the rewards are:

  • You change the lives of those around you and influence them for long-term positive change.
  • Your body can heal itself better and faster because it avoids releasing too much damaging chemicals, like cortisol. (We need cortisol, but not in excess.)
  • The brain stays active and in creative solution thinking.
  • and so much more…

Brain Tumor – Sharing My daughter’s Story

My daughter had a brain tumor at age 14, which we found when she couldn’t remember her first dance she went too or the prior two weeks.

Waking up and not being able to remember anything is scary and especially for someone so young. My daughter couldn’t remember her sibling’s names but did know they were family somehow. However, she could not remember anything before that day and did not remember she had already eaten breakfast.

We immediately rushed her to the hospital, where she had a partial complex seizure. She had had them for quite a while, but we didn’t know that’s what they were. We thought she was a spacey teenager.

Reneé, my wife, was in the room when she had it, along with the doctors, so they pointed it out to her.

As a parent, I felt awful for not recognizing this sooner. I could go into self-defeat and beat myself up for being a lousy parent, but that would not help her or me.

Handling the struggle together.

The timeframe was around Halloween, so we were going to a party and decided to have fun with this situation, with my daughter’s full participation.

We came up with the idea to paint a jello mold brain to look like a real brain and put it on top of my daughters head. The costume made it look like she had an exposed brain. I went as the surgeon and my wife as a nurse. We got a lot of laughs but also several scowls. You can’t please everyone.

Together, we laughed, cried and laughed some more, but this is how we face problems. Approaching problems with laughter keeps your body healing.

The surgery went well but grew back four years later.

I could have gone into woes me; this sucks, I hate life mode or stay focused and remain positive and upbeat. You guessed it; we remained positive and upbeat.

Alia is an amazing girl and has always tried to stay positive, despite some of her hidden demons of depression, anxiety, and suicidality at times. I’m grateful for the tools and the things I’ve learned to help her along her journey.

Long story short, she had another surgery, the surgeon was a lot more aggressive and removed the amygdala and hippocampus. She’s doing well, and most importantly, to her, she’s driving.

Summation how to face problems and handle challenges and struggles

I’ve studied and read so many books on the bodies ability to heal itself, but it is always based on two things, remaining positive and happy. (it’s your choice) The more positive and happy you are, the better your body can fight any sickness, or face any challenge. Your brain can learn new behaviors that keep you focused on healing.

Look at the challenges and struggles you’re facing and start changing your viewpoint and be positive about it. Step back and look at the lessons learned and value from those lessons.

If you need additional help and support to accomplish your goals and manage your life, please contact me. As a life coach, I can help you live the life you want.

You’re amazing, believe it!

Increase Your Energy by Getting Rid of Stuff

Utah Family Therapy is one of my businesses that I’m part owner in and I love it, and it’s where my greatest passion is because we’re helping individuals struggling with addictions, anxiety depression. We’re helping couples come together and unite and connect with purpose and doing that same thing for family systems

I love helping people, and that’s what started me doing this as well as many other things.

I wanted to answer the question we talked about last week,
about focus. We want to focus on those things that we are best at, those things that just make us so excited to work on. These are the things that give us energy. Everything outside of this, we’re going to call it stuff.

Our goal is to get get rid of stuff. We want stuff to go down and gradually get rid of it so our energy will go up.

What is stuff?

Stuff would be things that don’t give you energy, which doesn’t excite you or motivate you; Stuff causes you to stay stuck in the same place and not moving.

When you get rid of stuff, you have the energy for life, and you want to keep going.

Stuff can be different for everybody so for me some of the stuff that I’m dealing with is website stuff. I don’t find enjoyment in working with websites. Even though I don’t enjoy it, I do it because I have to but it’s not something that I get excited or jazzed.

New Concept

I want to introduce this new concept, get rid of the things you don’t like that don’t give you energy and bring in those things that do provide you with energy.

For me, one of the things that give me energy is doing these shows. Whether one person listens to it or a thousand I don’t care it fuels me. I get excited to do these. I love doing them.

We want to get rid of stuff because that is clouding up our lives; stuff reduces our quality of life. We wake up in the morning, and we get down when we think of all of the stuff we have to get done, and none of it we want to do.

Then there are those few things that just a mere thought of them excites you. Your energy goes up just thinking about them. You can’t wait to get to that matter, and you want to push everything else to the side because you want to do it so bad.

Those things that are just stuff get in the way and diminish the quality of our life. We need to start doing those things that give energy, and man life gets exciting. I learned this concept from Dan Sullivan he is phenomenal.

Increase Energy

The most exciting thing that I realized was the more I get rid of stuff, the more energy I get. I can find more time in the day. I can accomplish so much more because I’m excited and energized to do it.

I’m able to go from one thing to the next, full of energy. I don’t get that four o’clock depression or whatever you want to call it. I’m doing those things that give me passion, excitement and yes even more energy.

Identify Stuff

Identify five kinds of stuff in your life and then identify five energy; focus on getting rid of the stuff and add more things that give you energy.

Reduce the five (5) stuff down to only three things, give them away; have someone else do that stuff. You can teach somebody else how to do the stuff. Identify what it is and then reduce it in the next month, reduce it to three. The more stuff you keep identifying work on getting rid of it.

In conclusion, the goal is only to be doing those things that give you energy and get rid of the stuff. Focus on those things that give you that energetic passion, that drive for life.

As you get rid of stuff, it will help get rid of depression, anxiety and those negative thoughts you may be having. If it doesn’t get rid of it, you will have an increase in your energy to manage it.

Motivational Speaker & Personal Improvement Coach Tony Rhoton 801.787.5765


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